You Don’t Have to Be A Victim: It’s Time to Make a Change


You Don’t Have to Be A Victim

It’s Time to Make a Change

By Dr. Roberta J. Wilburn

Today is the first day of the rest of your life. If you don’t like the way things have been going, then you have an opportunity to make a change. It’s unfortunate that many of us live a significant portion of our lives with the horrible secret that we are victims of physical, emotional, and psychological abuse. We don’t want to admit it to our friends and family because of the stigma and shame that we carry around with us every day. We keep telling ourselves that he will change but the truth of the matter is, we know deep down inside us, it is going to happen again and again. We blame ourselves and we try to change to live up to the expectations of our loved one but no matter how hard we try; he will find something else that we have done or we didn’t do that will make him mad. Then he will deliberately inflict more pain on us and if we have children, they may be victims of his abuse as well. We tell ourselves that he loves us and that if we were a better wife, daughter, or girlfriend he wouldn’t treat us so badly. Domestic violence isn’t about love—it’s about power and control. We’ve been told “I love you” and “it will never happen again” and we want desperately for it to be the truth but it isn’t. We don’t leave because we’ve been conditioned to believe that it’s our fault so we suffer in silence, and walk around in fear and intimidation. I’m here to tell you that God didn’t give you the spirit of fear, but power, love and a sound mind (II Timothy 1:7). I’m here to tell you it is time to make a change so you can get the help that you need, and you can be all that God created you to be.

You may feel like you are the only one living this nightmare but many women find themselves in the same situation that you are facing. According to research, approximately 33 million women are affected by domestic violence each year. That is 1 in 10 women, and 1 in 3 women experience physical violence by their partner in their lifetime. This is one too many–so it is time to break the silence about domestic violence so we can let women everywhere know that they don’t have to continue to live like this.

The Bible says that you are fearfully and wonderfully made (Psalm 139:14) by the creator of the universe to be loved, cherished, and protected—not to be someone’s punching bag, or to be disrespected.  It’s time to make a change: break the silence and get the help you need. There are people available to help you—you don’t have to go through this alone. I am here for you, and there are other women at Jesus is the Answer who can be a support to you as well. In the past I’ve been where you’ve are but I am a living witness that God can change things and take what the enemy meant for evil and turn it around for your good. Now I am happily married and I don’t live in fear like I did in the past; afraid that the person who was supposed to love me would suddenly turn into my abuser. Don’t wait until it is too late. Get help now.

If this blog has inspired you or even stirred up some unhealed wounds within you, or maybe you have been looking for someone that could relate with what you have been going through. You are in the right place, A Safe place to not only share but to gain a friend and a support system. Please feel free to reply with your comments and or opinions regarding this topic and I will respond to your request. I look forward to hearing from you.

Don’t forget;

You don’t have to continue to be a victim. It’s time for you to make a change so you can move from victim to victory because you are more than a conqueror through Christ Jesus. Remember, no matter what your problem are;

Jesus is the Answer.